It's Everywhere!

Unlike Manifest Density, I don't have problems with Nigerians contacting me for money. Kitty, however, can't say the same thing; he's constantly harassed by Nigerian kittens. From a recent electronic missive:

Amalinze Teh Cat
Lagos Cat Pound,
Lagos, Nigeria

Dear Frinend,


Oh hai, Iz Amalinze, the favouritest kitteh of teh late pressydentalist of Nigeria. As you knoez mah late master wuz very very rich man and he givez meh all fisheez of Nigeria. I luv fishees cuz flavr be nice. But, as kitteh, I no can has fridgerador of mai ownz for fisheez can be fresh.

Mai good frinend, ther can beez many many fisheez and without more fridgeradors, oh noez! Tuna go bad. I eatz many but Iz small kitten and much sick.

So Iz writin u, mai very good friend, as u is well known in Nigeria as godly person with lots of fridgeradors.

U can help storez mai tuna yes? I givez u 20% (TWENTY AMERICAN PER CENTS) of each fishee -pluz heds!

Pleez u can writes bak soon. Wether iz hot and ther be many bad kittehs looking with the eyez at my fishees. U helpz then wez can be friendz more.

Ur good friend,
Amalinze