Harry Potter and the Mundane Hallows: The Verdict

Wholly, capital D- no, all capital letters-

DISAPPOINTING.

• Underdeveloped but at the same time overly ambitious- half of the subplots just sort of disappeared,
  
• Too many loose ends neatly tied up like a dainty little birthday present wrapped at the Hallmark store- Sopranos this ain't,
  
• Too cut and dry, black and white, good vs. evil,
  
• Too much cramming of the last six books into the final one- ostensibly to reward careful readers with inside "jokes", maybe? But at the same time, too much time spent in the exposition, catching readers up to speed,
  
• Too much reliance on plot and literary devices that had been thoroughly and painfully exhausted in the previous six books - how many times can Hermione shout at Ron, "Are you or are you not a wizard?",
  
• Sloppy editing (count the typos, comma splices, and misplaced modifiers! And the ellipses... ... ... ...),
• Dan Brown-style plot devices that showed up out of nowhere and were completely incongruous (to be fair, at least J.K. Rowling can actually rely on magic as a premise, unlike Dan Brown),
• Treacly, sappy, and implausible ending,
• Boring, if not wholly confusing epilogue.
  

All that said, did no one else think it was more than a little fishy- and not a little nervewracking- that Dick Cheney got to wield supreme executive power on the day that the world learned of the fate of Lord Voldemort?

There are no accidents in the universe.

Or should I end this post... with... an air... of mystery...