Friday, September 04, 2009

Observations on My First Day as a Student of Global Health

My Future is Bright
Observe:The Down Side
I am going to get my ass handed to me on a silver platter. I was already a little addle-brained over the bio. Then, in Global Health Frameworks, our professor asked, "How many people have had organic chemistry? Remember when you got your first grade of50 on a paper? This class is kind of like that."

The Up Side
Happily, the public health and international development students seem to mitigate those fears by drinking. A lot.

The Other Down Side
There were five or six people in my immediate seating vicinity who were sneezing and wheezing throughout class. I'm glad we're all such assiduous students, but you would think that public health kids would know better that to come to class sick. I'm going to be pissed if I get H1N1, especially after I tried so hard all summer to get it before it mutates and kills us all. Way to FAIL, Mexico.

The Other Up Side
When I'm dead from mutated H1N1, I won't need to worry about knowing translational biomedicine.

But, Bio Flashcards and All...
I'm definitely in the right place. For what might be the first time in my life, I am among a peer group that joins me in taking the stairs by choice, talks about childhood diarrhea at the dinner table, thinks gym teachers are the future, and agonizes over whether or not to drink that incredibly corrosive, incredibly unsustainable, incredibly tasty and satisfying Diet Coke.

Something That Touches All of Us. Bad Touch.
In our "Welcome to the Rest of Your Life" scare speech, the professor cautioned us that if we're out to save the world, we're a little too late, and should possibly consider another line of work. I thought about it for a moment, until I went to the bathroom, where they have automatic flush toilets. Automatic flush toilets and faucets are one of the greater and grosser public health nuisances in the United States. Women are afraid to sit on them, lest they flush mid-evacuation. So they hover over the seats and don't, um, make it, so you get layers upon layers of pee. IThen, you go to the faucets are so frustrating that people give up without washing their hands. I'm not a big germophobe; I feel people should have some germs and build up antibodies. But remember that those people not getting a hand wash just came from some awfully gross toilets. I'm very seriously considering doing my practicum investigating which costs more: the costs of all the days and productivity lost from people spreading germy nasties from automatic flush toilets, or the costs of completely rehauling the bathrooms in the school of public health.

Automatic flush toilet eradication: it's the next polio vaccine.

2 Comments:

Blogger Kaze, Latte, & Chase said...

Oy...my legal prof who is totally un PC just called it Hini...and the whole class giggled. Grad school....fun stuff huh?

L

11:08 AM  
Blogger arhul said...

I think the name must be an expert professor in anything

12:48 PM  

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