Inappropriate Thoughts While Watching the Ford Funeral

If like me, you woke up to your head banging (no, am not hungover, but my upstairs neighbors feel that it's completely appropriate to put in a new floor on a day off at the ungodly hour of 9 AM!! Assholes) and faced with the choice between catching up on the latest Britney unnews or watching the Ford funeral, well, der.

Soem thoughts:

• George H.W. Bush looks completely resigned to the fact that he's next to go. I think we can all agree that Jimmy Carter, the Ned Flanders of Presidents, will never die, he'll just morph into some sort of talking presidential library.
  
• Poor Betty Ford. She looks like she really wants a drink.
  
• Whoa, those Episcopalians need to do a better job of making their altar boys not look like KKK members. C'mon, a red sash or something.
  
• Would it kill W Bush to sit up straight?
  
• Wait, does HW Bush realize that Lyndon Johnson, not Ford, took over after Kennedy's death?
  
• You know, if Ford really wanted to erase the trauma of Watergate, he would have razed that building. God, I hate having to see that every time I'm on my way to Bed, Bath, and Beyond and the other suburban wonders. What an eyesore.
  
• OMG, HW Bush just had the funniest moment of his life, making fun of Dana Carvey making fun of him. Metahumor is always appropriate.
  
• Whoa, lengthy much, Kissinger? A simple "Betty, crank it" would have sufficed.
  
• Whoa, it looks like one of those kids is really broken up. Cheer up! It's not like it's a funer-- oh oops. Maybe I'll shut up now.